Hot travel tips.

Ok, my friend PC works in the Travel Insurance industry. In fact, his actual title is “Director of Direct Marketing & Sales”, in addition to this, he’s also a Certified Travel Agent.

Now, having such an esteemed title, agent certification, and position not only includes great responsibility, but great opportunities as well. One such opportunity presented itself last year, when he was invited to be the “celebrity speaker” on an Internet radio show regarding travel.

The first sign of a problem was when they listed him on their website with the title of “Dr” David Craychee. Things went down hill from there, my favorite part though is the following – in the final moments of the show, the host asked “Dr. Craychee” for some good advice travelers could use when they travel.

Dr. David, after only a moments hesitation, goes on to recommend the following: “When you’re traveling alone and ordering room service for breakfast, don’t order just one meal, order two! That way, if people are looking at the orders left out for room service they think two people are staying in the room, not just one, plus if it’s a business trip you could expense it to the company.”

This, dear readers was the advice of a Certified Travel Agent, Director of Direct Marketing and Sales and sometimes know-it-all. Not advice about making sure you have a packing list, photograph the belongings you suitcase in case you need to file an insurance claim if they’re damaged or stolen while on your trip, not obtain timers for your lights while you’re away, not even have your mail picked up if you’re not having it stopped. No, none of these, not even the famous Jennifer Saunders line “You can never have enough hats, gloves and shoes”, but “eat for two & expense it to your company.”

Are there are a lot of people that circulate through hotel rooms looking at room service orders that make this sort of deception necessary? Would this really work? I think it just goes to show, that even if you see CTA after your travel agents name, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they know what they’re doing.

My ultimate hope is that Dr. PorkChop will one day compile all of his helpful hints like this in one large volume, perhaps updated on a quarterly basis so we can all benefit from his travel advice. What else might be in there? When making dinner reservations on your trip, make them for a party of four if you’re traveling alone so that the maitre d doesn’t think you’re a total friendless loser. If you’re traveling to a snowy city, set up an appointment for a Brazilian wax the week before, so you can feel tropical the whole time you’re in the cold!